Hi everybody. This is Tracie Beasley of Nature to Nurture Life Coaching, and I am coming to you super spontaneously. I wanted to share with you some of what's been happening with me over the last few weeks in hopes that it will help you be easier on yourself and really allow creativity and finding what you need to feel good.
Balance is a big thing for me. I'm running a brand new business, trying to grow, trying to pay my bills and make sure my groceries are on the table, and my kitty is fed, and I've also discovered that I really need a lot of time to be healthy. Healthcare, self-care, healing... it's non-negotiable. Things go haywire when we don't attend to it, and that's what's really happened to me recently.
We have these pieces inside ourselves that like to help guide our days (more on this in future blogs). We have our lizard brain that puts a lot of fearful thoughts in place (it's purpose is to keep us alive, after all), and I have what I call my manager inside that's "Get it done! Get it on the books! Calendar it in! Create blocks! Here's your work time! Here's your play time! Here's when you could do this..Pool time here.". I've played the last
couple of years with putting it all on my calendar and seeing if it works (for me), and
inevitably, often it doesn't work.
I have had my manager kick in recently because it feels like there are more things than
usual to get done, so my "do" pile is getting huge. My "do" pile is down in that little tiny corner. It is the "be" pile, and when the "do" pile is big, the "be" pile isn't getting done.
Life really is about making space for all of it, which is what I have here (in this image). Our "be" pile, our "grow" pile, and our "do" pile. This is a model that works for me.
So my anxiety was going up from stress. I had a lot of emotional charge. Politics
have been crazy. I take on the energy of that. I've had some shifts in connection; just a lot going on emotionally, so boom! I ended up taking anxiety medicine most of this past week and trying to set it aside, trying to keep going. I felt like I was inside a washing machine spinning around. I was froze-n fight flight freeze. I was frozen nothing was getting done, so what did I finally do?
Well first I dragged myself out of the house (sometimes we burrow in when our true selves want us to do the opposite) an hour away to go to a healing circle, and it was beautiful, and I was beginning of the process to allow what I needed. You see, my body has been telling me what I need. When I hurt (physically) more than usual, I need to rest. I need to make a change. If you put your finger on a hot stove, your body tells you to take your finger off. If you get the flu, your body says rest, take fluids, maybe take some herbal medications. You create change. Our true selves know when we need to do something differently, and by piling these things on and not dealing with release (and change) that I needed to take care of, my body just kept getting more constricted and more emotionally charged, and it just didn't feel good at all.
I was getting nothing done, so I allowed myself on the way home (from the healing circle)...I came home and allowed the tears. I finally did some journaling. My heart felt better. My body felt better, and the last thing I did near bedtime was, I stripped anything off of my phone (calendar) that was not an actual appointment. Those pool reminders... I know when those classes happen. I know I want my focused work time in the morning- that's my grow time. I know I want time at the beginning of the day for "be time". When I put it all in my phone, this visual representation of it feels really, really awful to my body.
This morning I got up, and my house still is not vacuumed. My car still is not cleaned, but I left (my house anyway). I took care of myself- I went to the grocery store and restocked my toilet paper, then I thought of someone else and bought barbecue to share with that someone on Tuesday, and on the way home I spontaneously) decided to stop at a new business. I went in, talked to the owner, and I've now created the beginning of a new business partnership. I'm in the flow. My body feels good. My heart and my soul want to guide me (versus my brain and my "manager"). We can play with our systems and our tools.
Sometimes what works one month, one year, is not what's gonna work in the future. But listen to your body. How do we find the balance? How we find the answers... our
bodies will tell us! Yes, I have much to do, and it's scary. You know those thoughts are still there, but I'm calm and I'm steady and I do not feel like I'm in my washing machine anymore. I feel that excitement again, and I feel that flow, and so I hope this message is
something useful to you. I hope you're enjoying the beautiful blue skies wherever you are. Lots of love and light until our next spontaneous video! Have a beautiful